Marriage, Abstinence, and Lent

The Traditional Exegesis of Joel 2:16

Recently, there has been quite an interest in the restoration of various traditional Lenten disciplines. Part of this has been the great attention given to traditional fasting and abstinence, yet it is important to remember that the great richness of the Traditional Lenten disciplines does not have its complete fulfillment in a mere adherence to certain dietary restrictions. In fact, the range of disciplines practiced traditionally in the Church is much broader than this. I believe that it is quite important to emphasize these other practices, as an organic culture of voluntary penances will take sharper form in the future.

One of these traditional penances concerns sexual relations between the married. Many of the Fathers witness to the common practice of abstinence from the marriage bed during penitential seasons. As an example, one must merely skim through the Lenten sermons of St. Augustine to see multiple references to this practice. This custom received widespread ecclesiastical sanction, as is evident from quite a few ecclesiastical monuments. There are quite a few, but here are a handful:

First, in his Letter to the Bulgarians, Pope St. Nicholas I instructs them that this is an essential part of the Lenten fast: “Indeed if, with the consent of the spouse, one perhaps spends time in prayer with a clean body at some other time as well, how much the more on this day — a day upon which we give the tithes of our flesh to God, we imitate the Lord Himself in abstinence, and we rightly cut from ourselves not only illicit things, but also from many things which are allowed — should we not also renounce every pleasure and apply ourselves to the chastity of our mind and body, in order that we may licitly spend time in prayer!” (ch. ix)

Second, this was included in the decretals of Gratian (Pars Secunda, Causa XXXIII, Quaest. IV) as a law of the universal Church (Fratres non solum debetis ab omni immunditia abstinere, sed etiam ab uxoribus propriis studiosissime contineatis. Nullus omnino uxori suae jejuniorum diebus conjungatur).

Third, in the Roman Catechism: “As every blessing is to be obtained from God by holy prayer, the faithful are also to be taught sometimes to abstain from the marriage debt, in order to devote themselves to prayer. Let the faithful understand that (this religious continence), according to the proper and holy injunction of our predecessors, is particularly to be observed for at least three days before Communion, and oftener during the solemn fast of Lent.” (n.b., this is repeated by Bl. Innocent XI in his Cum ad aures)

Fourth, in the traditional rite of matrimony, the Missal included an instruction for the priest to seriously admonish abstinence during penitential seasons (Moneat eos Sacerdos sermone gravi, ut sibi invicem servent fidem: orationis tempore, et præsertim jejuniorum ac solemnitatum, casti maneant).

NOTE: This is the reason for the traditional prohibition of marriages during the season of Lent. It is also interesting to note certain studies demonstrating a dramatic drop in births nine months after Lent in former ages.

There is a two-fold reason for this: a) to fight sin, and b) to aid prayer.

First, one of the purposes of penance is to abstain from licit pleasures in order to defend oneself against illicit pleasures (Pope St. Nicholas I, so that the person who recalls that he has committed illicit deeds may keep himself on these days even from licit things; Pope St. Gregory I, Often they that are in power, whereas they know not how to refrain lawful actions, slide into such as are unlawful and unquiet. For he alone is never brought down in things unlawful who is careful to restrain himself at times even from things lawful). The control of the soul over the passions of the body is strengthened when occasion is given to exercise this control. Hence, if one is able to abstain from food for 40 days, he will be strengthened against the vice of gluttony. In a similar way, if one is able to control lawful passions exercised in marriage, he will be strengthened against the vice of lust. This is even more necessary in an age in which the most abominable sexual sin is an almost universal experience, and even the sacred bed of marriage has been construed into an “anti-Christian hedonism.” (Ven. Pius XII)

Second, St. Paul witnesses that periods of abstinence from sexual relations are proper in those seasons of prayer so that “you may devote yourselves to prayer.” (1 Cor. 7:5) What is a more fitting time for such an exhortation to apply than the time of Lent, where one of the traditional triad is prayer (cf. St. Paul VI’s Paenitemini).

Yet, there is an even more important witness of the encouragement of this discipline: the liturgy. As is emphasized constantly by the authors who write on the liturgy, the will of Holy Mother Church for certain seasons is presented by the texts she chooses for the liturgy. One of the texts chosen for the Ash Wednesday liturgy is Joel 2:12–18. In this text, we see an interesting exhortation: “let the bridegroom go forth from his bed, and the bride out of her bride chamber.” (v. 16b)

As I will demonstrate in this article, the traditional exegesis of this passage explicitly teaches that this passage contains an exhortation to abstain from sexual relations during the season of Lent. Hence, due to the inclusion of this text in the liturgy, it can be rightly concluded that the traditional practice continues to be encouraged by the Church as an act of penance.

The notable French jurist, Robert Joseph Pothier, brings all these strands together (along with an impressive collection of references) in his Traité du contrat de mariage (n. 371), giving the judgment that “It is a very ancient discipline in the Church not to permit the celebration of marriages during certain seasons of the year dedicated to penance, especially during the holy season of Lent. This discipline, whose beginning is unknown and which probably goes back to apostolic times, is established by the canons of some of the most ancient councils…This prohibition of celebrating marriages during seasons dedicated to penance and prayer is very much in keeping with the spirit of the Church…By the same spirit she has always exhorted (and still exhorts today) married persons to abstain, by mutual consent, from the use of marriage during these holy seasons. For this reason the Church has chosen for the Epistle of the Mass of Ash Wednesday a passage from the prophet Joel which says: Egredietur sponsus de cubili suo, et sponsa de thalamo suo.”

This text and some of the other related proofs, along with a more extensive explanation, are brought forward by Fr. Thomas J. Gerrard in his work Marriage and Parenthood, chapter 7 on “Conjugal Restraint.”

Traditional Exegesis of Joel 2:16